I am only thinking out loud on this post. I am trying to leave record everywhere I can think of today because… well… I don’t know why. But I marked it in my journal, which will only get stashed in some box after it’s used up and I’ll never get it out again. I can wrap it in neon paper and write “REMEMBER THIS JOURNAL” and it will still get boxed up and never seen again.
But somehow I need to leave record to remember to come back to this week. SOMETHING IS DIFFERENT.
Just to note… It is Wednesday, April 22, and to this date in this week nothing has happened.
Weird. I know.
At the beginning of this week, the Lord spoke to me as I was looking over some books and picked up Mark Batterson’s The Grave Robber. I have been reading it this week and the Lord is really tearing me up on the matter of miracles. When I picked it up earlier in the week the Spirit spoke to me and said, “I’m going to teach you about the miraculous.”
So… to this date… I am making it official: NOTHING HAS HAPPENED.
Our leadership team looked at a building again some of us really liked, but a contractor let us know this was not a good place to look at for what we needed… not for the money we had to utilize.
We are waiting on paperwork to get a closing date on our church property and now I have a conference call with the buyers tomorrow… so nothing there. Only more nerves.
Not. One. Miracle.
Nothing has changed.
But I need to mark down this week. Why?
Because everything has changed. Something deep inside me on the bus this morning just shifted. I was reading another chapter in Batterson’s book… and in my mind I pictured the rudder of a ship turning. Imperceptible. Yet… the small change in the course of a rudder would alter the course of an entire freighter. Something changed.
I see no miracles right now… yet… I see miracles right now.
(I am beginning to think I need to leave this page private. This is just too weird right now.)
Today is a day of new wineskins in my thinking and in my spirit. There is a place of possible despair staring at me as I think of what we can not know when it comes to these deep changes in the church. Yet, it is the very place the Spirit has led me… so there is instead great faith. I can’t explain it. I just know I need to mark this week and I need to mark it while NOTHING is happening.
Because while nothing outwardly is happening, something inward just shifted. Dramatically. Powerfully.
It’s like, “I was blind and now I see.”
The impossible is now possible. And the POSSIBLE is now ahead.