The Monster We Have Created

An interesting article on high school students wanting to get into colleges where they have been waitlisted.

We really have created a generation where kids think they DO deserve everything, and are shocked, SHOCKED, when they get rejected or waitlisted. Plus, there are some parents who are shocked, SHOCKED! as well and pester the admissions offices.

One particular comment from a student in the article is a crushing comment to me. She was worried she wasn’t doing enough to get the attention of the college admissions office.

The monster we have created is not just a generation of kids who think they “deserve” everything, but a generation that is built on VOLUME.

“If I don’t get my way, I just do MORE of what I think they want.”

“If I don’t get my way, maybe screaming louder will help.”

This is a crushing thought because it builds in the fallacy that if WE just do MORE we get what we want.

And think of what this will do to those coming up in the Church. They don’t wait on God. They can’t take “No” from God. If God seems to be silent, they think they need to do MORE to get his attention…

We have things to learn and things to teach.

First of all, rejection happens. Failure happens. It’s not final. It’s not devastating. Learn from it. Move on.

Second, you cannot do everything. If you don’t discipline your life in some key areas, you will find you can’t do ANYTHING. 

The world is not your oyster. Sometimes the world is your sandtrap. Or quicksand. Use caution. 

Third, more isn’t better. Sometimes more it’s  just more… and annoying. Learn moderation.

Fourth, there are a ton of colleges in these United States and there are some really great ones. One of my son’s friends was getting his pick of colleges and one of the top colleges in the nation (it is just a smaller school so it’s not on everyone’s radar) actually offered this young man MORE scholarship money when he delayed his decision to try and lure him in. So he is going to a top school in his field for FAR LESS money out of his pocket than a great public school ten minutes from his house. The lesson here is to learn how look around. 

I am a parent of this current generation and I’m kicking myself as much as the next person. It is time to be the TEACHER and not act like we’re just best buds with our kids.

The Obsession With Our Children’s Happiness

This article by Lori Gottlieb is a fascinating read, especially as a parent with kids coming into this time of life. The big question the author dealt with as a therapist was this: “Is it possible we’ve done too much as parents?”

Have we so doted on them and lifted them up and given them so many, “You can do ANYTHING” speeches that we have actually created a whole new set of problems?

This is an article very much worth reading. I could post quotes all day long. Let me post this one just for thought:

Nowadays, it’s not enough to be happy—if you can be even happier. The American Dream and the pursuit of happiness have morphed from a quest for general contentment to the idea that you must be happy at all times and in every way.

Hard Work and Determination

I am reading a book with my church staff about the “Me Generation.”  It is a study, with some very funny sharp opinions, about our current generation. There are some very admirable things about this current generation. One thing I was admittedly surprised about was they seem to have high goals. The downside is they don’t seem to want to work for them. AND, it’s about notoriety. It’s about the 15 minutes of fame and the American Idol mystique.

This article about Supreme Court Justice Byron White is superb. He was incredibly skilled as an athlete AND a scholar. He was also a WWII hero.

He also hated fame. His actions as a WWII hero were enough to gain him incredible fame. Add to that his accomplishments as a football player in his era, and then on top of that his incredible intellect… and he simply avoided the media. What was wrong with that guy?

It’s a great story and a great lesson. Enjoy.