Apprentice 2 Jesus

There is simply a holy desperation I need to pursue God. There needs to be a total frustration with how things are going, a stirring up the Holy Spirit wonderfully brings, that drives me nuts! If I don’t have it, I just keep in a routine that is deadening.

There is a choice: Keep going the way you are going, or ask for, expect, and then receive that holy hunger. The routine is comfortably numbing. Slowly, I can die this way. The hunger from God will disturb me, twist me, frustrate me, and could ultimately take me nowhere since I could allow the voices of others, especially family, dissuade me. Others who know they need a holy hunger, then “get jealous” if they see it in others, tend to undermine the hunger of those who have it. Maybe they don’t mean it, but it does work to dissuade. I hate that.

Which way to choose?

September will be a challenge. I will be going on a 21 day fast, the last two weeks of which I am challenged by the Lord to do “water only.” First time for that.

Pray for me.